a common thing, they say: marriage

This writing pops out of my mind during a hubbub moment in a dark night in my room... It is not a weird thing to talk about marriage in my age. 24 is not young anymore.. I even ever have a dream to marry before i turn into 25 yo. But until now, i haven't found anyone suit my type or even close to my parents' approval... It is not like i am lonely or feeling intimidated by random pictures of my friend posing with their babies in fb or bbm, not at all, i mean it! Well, I will try to pour out this matter less emotionally. So, it was a day when my grandpa got sick in the hospital and dreadfully i was away in other island. I was doing my job taking care of my students, i thought i was going to visit my grandpa in the holiday season, 2 months later.... In my mind I had a plan to buy a couple native clothes for my grandparents and show them the money i got from that job. Out of my expectation, my grandpa's condition was going worse, when they told me about it i was in the same island but different province, coaching for debate championship... It is just about 8 hours if i ever wanted to go to my grandpa's hospital, or just an hour via plane. But it was a very difficult condition, my team proceeded to final and one of our best speaker just lost her grandma a night before the final and i comforted her, and helped her to focus on the final. I have a responsibility to make sure those babies got into their home safely after the championship... And at 10 o'clock, we arrived to our boarding house and not long after, my phone rang to inform me that my grandpa passed away.... It was too close if i chose to go back to Jogja, where my grandpa lied on the hospital, at least I could have seen him for the very last time and apologized for all mistake i made, for never been around him to listen to his story of life, for never cheered him up after hardworks he did on the rice field... A lot of things i regreted that time, as a consequence of my responsibility to my previous job that put me into this dilemma. And eventually i got a ticket home 6 hours later. I tried my best not to cry, but of course that would be impossible, moreover after my grandma hugged me so tight ans cried. She told me that even in my grandpa's last moment he was thinking of me, she told me that he said he would do his best so that he can stand with her witnessing my marriage, to see their grandgrand children... My heart was broken then, they really care of me and this long i was just messing around... I actually not their 1st grand daughter, they have a grand daughter 4 months older than me, that isn't married yet either, but they always think about me, but they always care of me, and i haven't treated them well enough..... The story is still very long, let's save it for next post...